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Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Reward is Cheese

Salut, I would be playing Sims 1 right now but I'm being a good girl and doing homework instead. When I say homework, I mean scrolling up and down Facebook aimlessly.

Anyway, more to the point - I've devised a very grate, puntastic, cheesy, edible list about cheese.

- Cheese has many different names in different languages, obviously.
In Spanish it's called queso
In Portuguese it's called queijo
In Dutch it is called kaas
In German it's called käse
In Russian it's called сыр (syr)
In Italian it is called formaggio

I believe the Italians are wise, wise people; the language seems to recognise my love of cheese. "Formaggio" is obviously meant to be interpretted as "For Maggie-o". Oh my cheesus, I am without words.


Typical  holey cheese as commonly seen amongst clouds

- Cheese can be made from the milk of cows, horses, camels, llamas, goats, sheep, buffalo, reindeer, rats and humans. Personally, I say llama cheese is the whey to go.

- Giraffes do not have a voice box. Neigh!

My favourite cheese is Camembert, I think. What is your favourite cheese ?

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Can you eat the skin of a McBanana?

Usually my thumb nail is successful in piercing the top of a banana to peel it. But today, I took one of the scary bananas from the fruit bowl and I couldn't even open it. I had to open it coccoon-style. And in order to eat the lower half, I had to committ the act of violently tearing it apart.

So I then pondered on whether I could have just eaten the whole thing, without doing all this peeling nonsense. I did some research and found that apparently it's easier to open a banana when you pinch the non-stalk end which will make the top end split. I also found that it's a bad idea to eat the skin of a banana because of the pesticides that are probably on it.


My illustration of what apparently happens when you pinch a banana's bum

All that aside, I decided to try some skin for myself anyway. It's slightly tough to bite a peice off, and as soon as you start chewing there's a dry and furry feeling in the mouth. After it's nearly all broken down, you get a feeling of impending regurgitation. The taste is quite strong and I could not swallow it, although some of it was inevitably swallowed.

Lesson of the day: Don't eat banana skin; you'll get pregnant, and die.


postscript: I thought it would be noteworthy to mention that I invented bananas.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

1, 2, Go!

(photo from autofiends.com)

This motorvehicle is a Cizeta v16, I reckon it's pretty hot. It has not two, but four flip-up headlights! And everything opens up backwards. It must be an alien. I only know of this car because it's in Gran Turismo 4 and it has a funny sounding engine. (btw I got that game for 15 bucks woohoo)

Check out this:


That's an image taken from Gran Turismo 5 which has not been released yet. It's on the Playstation 3 so I won't get to play it (dangit) but isn't it pretty ? Smooth enough to eat.

Speaking of racing games, I remember when I first played Need for Speed: Underground 2 and you start with a cool car and I was like woop woop! But then I had to give the car back to its owner, and I was like baby baby baby ohhh I thought you'd always be mine

I just scratched my neck. We have such big bananas in our fruit bowl, that they're scary. I'm serious they're really frightening. The bunch of them would probably weigh about as much as this laptop. Which is about seventeen kilograms.

One day I'll drive my Ferrari on a speed limitless road while listening to Deadmau5.